The Little (BIG) Things

This bike was a birthday present.  I even picked it out myself.  I will say that color and style had a great deal to do with my choice.  This lovely little bike has become a huge frustration for me.

The way you change gears on this bike is by twisting the grip.  Twisting it down switches to a lower gear.  Moving it up takes it to a higher gear.  And this is where the frustration comes in.  More details about that to follow.

After getting the bicycle, my husband and I started a Saturday tradition of riding our bikes together during the cooler early morning hours.  I suppose we have lost the ability along the way to sleep much later than 6:30 even on the weekends.

This last weekend the weather was gorgeous.  We had the whole day in front of us.  We set out on our Saturday morning journey.  And then the frustration set in.  I couldn’t shift the bike gears.  I kept trying to no avail.  Wiped off my sweaty hands and kept trying with no result.  Our neighborhood is filled with ups and downs, so gears that function are very helpful.  To make matters (so much) worse, my husband offered to help fix it.  He rode the bike just a little ways down the street and it worked just fine for him.

Getting back on my bike, with my gear shift problem still a problem (for me), I could feel the tears welling up behind my sunglasses.  I began to feel frustrated.  All the little frustrations from a very long week came to mind.  Even the ones that I felt like I had prayed through and had turned over to the Lord.  They all came crashing back down around me.  Frustrations with an ineffective work week, anxiousness over situations with my kids, and annoyance with a continually malfunctioning air conditioner and television cable system.  I was feeling overwhelmed at my list of tasks for the weekend and the week ahead and beaten down from burdened relationships.  I was frustrated, annoyed, weary, and I felt completely inadequate.

Moses felt that way.  God called out to him from a burning bush and while he was stunned and humbled to hear directly from the Lord, all he could really think about were his own inadequacies.  God had great plans to use Moses and he shared that plan with him.  And while I am sure there was a part of Moses that wanted to rise to the occasion, to immediately answer YES!, what he found himself doing (and what we do as well) is focus on his own inadequacy.  Five times in just two chapters in Exodus (3,4), Moses kept telling God over and over why he couldn’t do what God was calling him to.  And over and over God told him that He would provide.

All the small and big things that had happened in Moses’ life up to that point had caused him to doubt.  Doubt that he could be used by God.  Doubt that he was worthy.  And he then began to lose focus.  His focus became inward rather than upward.

I really believe Satan thrives in our lives sometimes through the little things in life that over the course of time (maybe a week, month, or sometimes just a really bad day) add up to BIG frustrations, anxiousness, worries, stress, and chaos.  Those little big things in our lives can cause us to lose focus.  When we take our eyes off Christ and His strength, His abilities, His awesomeness, we start looking inward.  And what we clearly see then is our mistakes, failures, and inadequacies that just keep stacking up.

The greatest reassurance God gave Moses that day out in the middle of the desert is found in Exodus 3:12 – “I WILL BE WITH YOU”.  He gives that same assurance to us.  Regardless of our weakness, He is strong!

My bike ride home that Saturday morning wasn’t a fast one (it was a much harder workout than planned given my gear shift inabilities) but it gave me a chance to pray about all those little (BIG) things in my life.  I asked God to shift all my priorities to fit His.  I asked Him for guidance as a wife, mother, and worker.  I prayed for His strength, His peace, His protection.  I even prayed for patience in the days ahead dealing with the air conditioner and cable companies.  But mostly I prayed that my focus would shift upward rather than inward.

By the time I rode into the driveway, I already felt better.  Partly because the ride was over (!) but mostly because the Lord had worked on my heart along the way.  Thankfully, Christ cares not just about the big things in our lives.  He truly cares about everything, even the small pesky problems and frustrations.  And we have the blessed assurance that He will be with us through it all.

My prayer is that you feel His presence today, that you look upward rather than inward, and that you began to trust Christ with every little and big thing that comes around the bend.